6meses

por favor não façam um especial 7 meses...

já chega...

I wish it was me up there....

tempo

Dizem que todos os dias temos que comer uma maçã para o ferro e uma banana para o potássio.
Também uma laranja, para a vitamina C, meio melão para melhorar a digestão e umachávena de chá verde sem açúcar para prevenir a diabetes.Todos os dias temos que beber dois litros de água sim, e logo a seguir fazer xi-xi, que leva quase o dobro do tempo que os levei a beber).
Todos os dias temos que tomar um Activia ou um iogurte para ter 'L. Cassei Defensis', que ninguém sabe exactamente que merda é que é mas parece que se não ingeres um milhão e meio todos os dias começas a ver toda a gente com uma grande diarreia ou presos dos intestinos. Cada dia uma aspirina, para prevenir os enfartes mais um copo de vinho tinto, para a mesma coisa.
E outro de vinho branco, para o sistema nervoso. E um de cerveja, que já não me lembro para que era. Se os tomares todos juntos mesmo que te dê um derrame cerebral ali mesmo não te preocupes pois o mais certo é que nem te dês conta disso. Todos os dias tens que comer fibras. Muita, muitíssima fibra até que sejas capaz de defecar uma camisolona bem grossa. Tens que fazer quatro a seis refeições diárias leves sem te esqueceres de mastigar cem vezes cada garfada.

Ora, fazendo um pequeno cálculo apenas a comer vão-se assim de repente umas cinco horitas. Ah, depois de cada refeição deves escovar bem os dentes, ou seja: depois do Activia e da fibra os dentes depois da maçã os dentes depois da banana os dentes e assim, enquanto tiveres dentes sem te esqueceres nunca de passar o fio dental massajador das gengivas e bochechar com PLAX...
Melhor, amplifica a casa de banho e põe a aparelhagem de música lá porque entre a água, a fibra e os dentes vais passar horas quase metade do dia ali dentro. Equipa-o também de jornais e revistas para te pores a par do que se passa enquanto sentado na sanita. Temos que dormir oito horas e trabalhar outras oito mais as cinco que usamos a comer, faz vinte e uma.
Restam três horas sempre que não surja algum imprevisto.
Segundo as estatísticas, vemos três horas de televisão diárias. Bem, já não podes porque todos os dias devemos caminhar pelo menos uma meia hora (dado por experiência: ao fim de 15 minutos regressa senão andas mas é uma hora!) E há que cuidar das amizades porque são como uma planta: temos que as regar diariamente. E quando vais de férias, também suponho senão as plantas morrem nas férias. Para além disso há que estar bem informado e ler pelo menos um dos jornais diários e outro de uma revista séria para comparar a informação.

Ah! E temos que ter sexo todos os dias mas sem caír na rotina: temos que ser inovadores, criativos, renovar a sedução. Isso leva o seu tempo. E já nem estamos a falar do sexo tântrico!! ( A respeito disso, relembro: depois de cada refeição temos que escovar os dentes!) Também temos que arranjar tempo para a maquilhagem, a depilação/fazer a barba, varrer a casa, lavar a roupa, lavar os pratos e já nem digo, os que têm gatos, cães pássaros e uma catrefada de filhos...

No total, a mim dá-me umas 29 horas diárias se nunca parares. A única possibilidade que me ocorre é fazer várias destas coisas ao mesmo tempo: por exemplo, tomas duche com água fria e com a boca aberta, e assim bebes logo os dois litros de água de uma vez.
Enquanto sais do banho com a escova de dentes na boca, vais fazendo o amor, o sexo tântrico, parado, junto ao teu mais que tudo, que de passagem vê TV e te vai contando o que se passa,
enquanto varres a casa. Sobrou-te uma mão livre?
Telefona aos teus amigos e aos teus pais! Bebe o vinho (depois de telefonares aos teus pais vai fazer-te falta!). O iogurte com a maçã pode dar-te o teu par enquanto ele come a banana com a Activia.
No dia seguinte troquem. E menos mal que já crescemos, porque senão tínhamos que engolir mais umas cerelacs e um Danoninho Extra Cálcio todos os santos dias. Úuuuf!
Mas se te restam 2 minutos, reenvia isto aos teus amigos (que temos que regar como as plantas) enquanto comes uma colherzinha de Muesli ou Al-Bran, que faz muito bem...
E agora vou deixar-te porque entre o iogurte, o meio melão o primeiro litro de água e a terceira refeição do dia já não faço a mínima ideia o que é que estou a fazer porque preciso urgentemente de uma casa de banho.

Ah, vou aproveitar e levo comigo a escova de dentes...

Craigslist Meets WallStreet… Classic!

FOUND ON CRAIG'S LIST - what an awesome answer...

---

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York . I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn't able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 432279810

---

THE ANSWER
Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful"
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic "pump and dump."
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 4th, 2007 at 9:32 AM and filed under Wallstripped, Wallstrip, WallStrip.com.
Follow comments here with the RSS 2.0 (XML) feed. Post a comment or leave a trackback.

in http://www.atlantaillustrated.com/funpage/297/

Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy: Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an email he sent to his sister. She then sent it to Laughline, who was sponsoring a "worst job experience" contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with 5 other divers, were all laughing hysterically.Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make 3 agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling 35 minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for 2 days because my butthole was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

in http://www.wimp.com/jellyfish/

PORRA PARA A MADDIE

Interrompo este longo interregno de post para demonstrar aqui a minha indignação para com o exagerado numero de noticias e comentários e reportagens e porque não dize-lo com frontalidade: MERDA, sobre a infeliz história da filha dos McCann que desapareceu à 6 meses..

Tou farto desta estória!

Será que não à (não me enganei) mais nada neste mundo? Parece que não!

Estou neste momento a ouvir o Jornal da meia noite da SIC Noticias. Aparentemente os jornais britânicos fizeram uma sondagem em que 70% das pessoas dizem que não acreditam na estória dos McCann. MAS O QUE É QUE ISTO IMPORTA?? QUE RELEVÂNCIA NOTICIOSA EXISTE NESTE DADO?

Farto desta cena..

e ainda ficamos sem o All Garve.... ao meno o Al Gore veio cá duas vezes este ano...

E mai nada

Fascinating Facts About Japanese Video Games

by Emma Boyes

Konami have a special "Konami code" that reveals hidden features in their games. In the "Start" screen of any Konami game, press "up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-B-A".

In the original Space Invaders, the fact that the aliens started moving faster the more of them you shot was actually a bug. On the monitor, the screen refresh rate was linked directly to how many graphics were on the screen at the time - so the fewer aliens there were, the faster it was to draw them, and the faster they moved.

A man called Eric Furrer holds the record for non-stop Space Invaders play. He managed 38 hours and 37 minutes, and ended up with a total score of 1,114,000 points.

Space Invaders was so popular in Japan when it first came out that it caused a coin shortage until the country's yen coinage supply was quadrupled.

Nintendo's mascot, Mario, was named after Nintendo America's Italian landlord, Mario Segali.

Mario has starred in over 100 games since his first appearance in Donkey Kong in 1981.

Donkey Kong was originally called Jumpman.

Atari is a Japanese word that comes from the traditional board game "Go": its meaning is similar to that of "check" in chess. However, Atari is not a Japanese company: they started off in the US and are now owned by the French Infogrames Entertainment.

In fact, Atari was not their first choice of name. The founders, Nolan Bushnell and Ted Dabney, originally wanted to call the company Syzygy, which means "the straight line configuration of three celestial bodies". Unfortunately - and rather bizarrely - the name was already taken by a roofing company, so they had to go with their second choice.

The pre-launch adverts for the Sony Playstation baffled everyone with their strange slogan, "ENOS lives". To this day, nobody knows for sure what it means. Popular theories include that it stood for "entering ninth of September" - the original launch date - or that it is Sony written backwards by marketing people who can't spell.

Akira Yasuda (better known as Akiman), the Street Fighter artist who created kick-ass character Chun Li, based her on his wife.

Over 25% of all Dance Dance Revolution coin-ops in the world are in the diet- and fitness-crazy US state of California.

Pac-Man was originally called Puck-Man, from the Japanese word "paku", which means to open and close one's mouth. The name was changed for fear that when the game was released in the US, pesky teenagers would find it entertaining to amend one of the letters and create a more amusing name. Can you guess what that word was, kids?

The final level in the original Pac-Man is apparently impossible to finish.
The Marufuku Company were founded in 1889, and made Hanfuda, Japanese playing cards. They changed their name in 1951 to Nintendo, which means "leave luck to heaven".

Capcom stands for Japanese Capsule Computers. It is also a term used by NASA, which means "Capsule Communicators".

The release of the Nintendo N64 console reportedly caused riots among fans eager to get their hands on it when it first came out in Japan.

The immensely popular Xenosaga's full name is Xenosaga Episode 1: Der Wille zur Macht, which comes from German philosopher Nietzsche's view that the survival instinct is the base drive of all human existence. Who'd have thought?

In the cult classic shooter Xevious, a secret screen can be revealed by immediately moving to the bottom right hand corner and shooting continuously.
The first-ever female video game lead was Ms Pac Man, released by Midway (the American division of Namco) in 1981.

SEGA (Service Games of Japan) was originally created by three Americans, to import game machines for the amusement of bored American servicemen living in Japan. Originally the company imported photo booths into Japan - which are still to this day hugely successful - and then branched out into other coin-ops.

Many of the games in the Final Fantasy series have characters called Biggs and Wedge. This is a reference to two characters in Star Wars who help Luke Skywalker to destroy the Death Star.

The first video game death was in 1981, when 19-year-old Jeff Dailey died of a heart attack while playing Berzerk. This isn't the only death to have occurred while playing this game, either: 18-year-old gamer Peter Burkowski managed to get himself in the high score table twice in 15 minutes and then promptly collapsed.

On October 10th 2002, a man from Kwangju, South Korea died in an internet cafe after playing computer games for 86 hours solid, without stopping for food or sleep. Apparently, he collapsed at the terminal, but carried on playing when he regained consciousness. He died while taking a toilet break.

© Carter Witt Media 2006

Penafiel

Se há mais um noticiário abrir com a notícia de que a criança raptada vai ser ou não entregue aos pais hoje, amanhã ou daqui a um mês, eu vou lá e rapto a criança outra vez!
Mas que raio de país que está sem notícias e qualquer coisa é notícia. Já alguém reparou bem na história da família da criança? 7 filhos? vivem em condições muito difíceis e nem sequer vivem com os filhos todos já que alguns já foram retirados pela segurança social. Por isso é que ontem o preseidente da segurança social disse que deveria haver um tempo para avaliar as condições da família, ele desculpou-se dizendo mesmo as do bébé.

Aposto que o bébé não fica em casa até ao final do ano

Black Google Would Save 750 Megawatt-Hours a Year

by Mark Ontkush, Boston, Massachusetts, USA on 02.22.07

Science & Technology (electronics)

From the lights out department - did you know that a cathode ray tube (CRT) monitor uses about 74 watts to display an all white web page, but only uses 59 watts to display an all black page? Yes, there all still plenty of these still in use, particularly in China and Latin America. Worldwide, about 25 percent of the monitors currently in use are cathode ray tubes, which means that they waste energy displaying white backgrounds. This can add up for sites with a global audience.

Take at look at Google, for instance, who gets about 200 million queries a day. Let's assume each query is displayed for about 10 seconds; that means Google is running for about 550,000 hours every day on some desktop. Assuming that users run Google in full screen mode, the shift to a black background will save a total of 15 (74-59) watts. Now take into account that about 25 percent of the monitors in the world are CRTs, and at 10 cents a kilowatt-hour, that's about $75,000/year, a goodly amount of energy and dollars for changing a few color codes.

Of course, you don't need to stick entirely with black; you can try EMERGY-C, a low wattage palette that gives you a bit more flexibility, and only costs about 4 watts more than an all black page. Low wattage web design? It's the future. [We'll keep that low-power palette in mind for the next time we redesign the site! -Ed.]

small potatoes...

Assumptions: The Three Gorges Dam is rated at its full design capacity of 18 gigawatts. A nuclear power plant is postulated to be the equivalent of a 1.1-GW unit at the Diablo Canyon plant in California. A coal plant is one rated at 500 megawatts. A wind turbine is one with a 100‑meter blade span, and rated at 1.65 MW. A solar panel is a 2.1‑­kilowatt system made for home roofs. In comparing ­categories, bear in mind that the average amount of time that power is produced varies among them, so that total energy obtained is not a simple function of power rating.
src: Joules, BTUs, Quads—Let's Call the Whole Thing Off, IEEE Spectrum, January 2007
Illustration: bryan christie design. Click to enlarge.

Leaving aside some errors (the coal and nuclear numbers are off by about 10% to each other, and the capacity factor of wind turbines should be closer to 30%) the most essential oversight in that equation is elephantine:

It compares oil's inputs to the other's outputs.

Compared to that, the rest is small potatoes.

in http://www.theoildrum.com/node/2320

Pérola do jornalismos desportivo.. isto sim é um furo

O Benfica nunca recua Paris — O diário francês L'Équipe não demorou a descobrir um dos segredos do Benfica: com os jogadores lá dentro, o autocarro não anda de marcha atrás. Os jornalistas portugueses já conheciam essa velha superstição do clube, mas, agora, a mania tornou-se internacional. Daí, a curiosa diferença na chegada das equipas. O autocarro do Benfica apareceu primeiro, de frente. Os jogadores saíram e só depois o motorista fez a manobra, com marcha-atrás, para entrar no estacionamento. Menos supersticiosos, os franceses chegaram em marcha-atrás... e saíram mesmo à porta.

You tube comments

Regras dos Homens

The Guys' Rules

Finally , the guys' side of the story.
We always hear " the rules " From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. These are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!!!!

**********

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

************

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

************

1. Crying is blackmail.

************

1. Ask for what you want.

Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

************

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

************

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

************

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.

************

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

************

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 'S Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

************

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

************

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

************

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

************

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

************

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

************

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

************

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

************

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

************

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really .

************

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

************

1. You have enough clothes.

************

1. You have too many shoes.

************

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

************

1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

NÃO

Eu não acredito que o rei da madeira se demitiu e se voltou a recandidatar!!

Ele se fosse um gajo esperto tinha pedido que se fizesse um referendo para a independência da Madeira. De certeza que ganhava.. nós já pagámos demais para os ter connosco!

Eu sou pelo apoio inequívoco à independência da Madeira..

SIM

Eu voto SIM.
É preciso descriminalizar.
Ninguém vai liberalizar.

Eu voto SIM porque quem decide fazê-lo já tomou a decisão mais difícil.
Eu voto SIM porque nem todos tem os €400 para ir a Espanha ou os €1500 para o fazer numa clínica privada em Lisboa.
Eu voto SIM porque SIM

Argumentar com os meus impostos, que eu pago desde que tenho 18 anos, é que não.Quanto é que sai dos meus impostos para pagar cuidados de saúde a indigentes, imigrantes ilegais e ciganos? É que estes mal tem dores acorrem dos serviços do SNS sem qualquer problema e quem paga? Não vi ninguém a argumentar com os meus impostos quando se criaram as salas de chuto patrocinadas com os meus impostos.

Eu quero ver as mãezinhas queques que aparecem na Tv a dizer que votam não, quando as suas filhas aparecerem em casa com 13 anos a dizer que estão grávidas. Provavelmente voam logo até Londres ou Madrid e fazem-no por lá e aparecem numa qualquer revista do socialite a dizer que foram para retemperar forças.

Vamos acabar com a pouca vergonha.

Vamos acabar com os vãos de escada.

Não fiquem em casa. Vamos todos votar.

Vamos VOTAR SIM À DESPENALIZAÇÃO DO ABORTO

Concorda com a despenalização da interrupção voluntária da gravidez, se realizada, por opção da mulher, nas primeiras 10 semanas, em estabelecimento de saúde legalmente autorizado?

SIM